Dear Edmonds,
It’s been wild, exhausting, amazing, exhilarating and adventureous; you will ALWAYS hold a special place in my heart ♥️.
I’ve learned a great deal and grown immensely. You’ve introduced me to so many amazing individuals, MYSELF included!
Thank you for sharing your incredible flowers, the sound, the sauna (shout out to Harbor Square!), the ferry, the farmers market, the HILL and some of the most glorious weather I’ve experienced (raining ash NOT withstanding 🔥😳😬😟)
Here are just a few photos from our time together:
I gave the following remarks at my last Gratitude Ceremony AKA “coin-out” . . . PS I never did get an actual COIN!!
Two Tuesdays before I arrived in Edmonds, I experienced – what I now recognize as a panic attack during a couples therapy session.
Later that same day, while talking with my sister about the possibility of inpatient mental health treatment, she referenced her “strong, amazing, older sister”. I interrupted her to say: “see, that’s just it! I don’t see myself the way you do! I desperately WANT to see myself the way you do, I don’t know how, what is wrong with me?!”
I BELIEVED that she loves me unconditionally, while, simultaneously, understanding that I ONLY love myself under the very best of circumstances.
Once I met with Mike [a therapist at The Center], we began setting treatment goals. I confidently stated that my goal was to leave with “an unshakable sense of self”.
He didn’t have to say anything. The look on his face told me what he didn’t have to: “ambitious much?!?😳”
Within the first week we discussed “schemas”. Justin asked for an example and the words “I am bad .. . I am the problem…. I am the reason my family is hurting” ROLLED off my tongue. I had – I still HAVE- a LOT of work to do!
A few days later Angela, another group leader, asked us to write our affirmations. I had been listening to Sia during the break and I was feeling UNSTOPPABLE. I wrote out some affirmations and, that afternoon, added a few more songs to my “unstoppable” playlist.
Early last week, Karen encouraged our group to address a letter of gratitude to someone important to us. Lucky enough to have several people come to mind and not wanting to choose one over another, I wrote a letter to my younger self. It’s only a start but it’s a STRONG start.
At Angela’s suggestion, I bought a “clicker” and have committed to an AFFIRMATIVE conversation with MYSELF every morning before I speak with anyone else.
It matters which wolf you feed and, thanks to you, Edmonds (and a LOT of key players, namely my family, friends, ME, and an incredible support system!!!) I’ve FINALLY committed to feeding MYSELF and I am LEARNING to starve the wolf of self-hate.
When my children were young, I used to encouraged each of them to recite affirmations at tuck-in time. It truly had not occurred to me that I TOO needed to affirm MY SELF.
I am EricaNoelle and I am strong. 💪🏻
I am EricaNoelle and I am intelligent, intuitive, interesting and inspiring. 🔥
I am EricaNoelle and I am passionate. ❤️🔥
I am EricaNoelle and I am beautiful. 🌺
I am EricaNoelle and I am loveable. 💕
I am EricaNoelle and I am loved.🤟🏻
I am EricaNoelle and I am UNSTOPPABLE 🧡🔥❤️🔥💪🏻🤟🏻💕😊
*carpe diem*
Collecting Pieces of Me 